Saturday, April 14, 2012

The New Paradigm is Listing to the Port Side

   Something has happened recently, although I'm not quite sure just what. I seem to be in the middle of one of those fundamental shifts in physiology, and to a lesser extent, psychology. A mid-life Polar Shift, if you will. Everyone says that as you get older your metabolism changes, your eyesight fails, and a whole host of other events occur. I figured that these things would happened gradually, like a ice cube melting. But instead I've noticed they tend to evolve rather quickly - as in two weeks, or even overnight. One day I could read the directions on an aspirin bottle and (literally) the next day I could not.
   This past week I've lost any desire for spicy foods, and just the thought of belching all day quickly reinforces that. The other night I was craving refried beans and tortillas so I bought some Amy's Organic Refried Beans, opened the can, took a whiff, and dropped the whole thing into the trash - too spicy. And by too spicy I don't mean onions, jalapeno's or salsa, I'm talking about salt, pepper and paprika. Another development has been a loss of interest in meat. Yesterday I went through the refrigerator and tossed out all of the chicken, ribs and steak that resided therein. I kept the fish though.
   Of course, nature has its way of balancing out losses with gains and I've noticed a sudden interest in sugary drinks, which I've never really had before unless beer counts as a sugary drink. Sadly though, I've lost most interest beer, which really sucks since I've got a batch of home brew recently bottled and quietly maturing in a cool, dark place. I never thought I'd see the day when I'd feel compelled to swing by the convenience store and buy a Mexican Coke on the way home instead of a Shiner Bock... What is the world coming to?

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